A Sentiment

God knew what He was doing when He sent a gentle breeze and brought a lovely butterfly to set my heart at ease. The happiness of your friendship and the gentleness of your words have touched my life in special ways and now I feel assured. Thank you for your loyalty and for reading everyday. I only hope you find things to make a happy day.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

When Do You Stop Worrying?

I usually sit here and tell about what's going on in my life from day to day. It's a journal of sorts. I find that I have to be honest and say that I'm sometimes a worry wart. I read a very cute email about just such a person. It went through the different decades of her life...telling about her worries. I thought that I would change it up a bit and put some of my thoughts into it. So, here goes.

In my teens...I worried about grades, would everybody like me, having a date for the dance, and so many other things. I went to my Mom and asked for answers...she said, "Just give it time...it will all work out."

In my twenties after being married for a while, the babies started coming...and with them all new worries. Were they getting enough milk, when do I sleep, will they turn over, when do I sleep, why does he walk this way, when do I sleep, when do they start talking, and when do I sleep, do they ever stop talking? My pediatrician said..."Just give it time...it will all work out."

In my thirties the worries got worse, or so I thought. How are they doing in school, will they have friends, will they make the team, do they eat enough good food, will they outgrow that cowlick, oh dear, could I be pregnant. My husband said to me, "Don't worry so much...it will all work out."

In my forties two were in the military and one still at home. My concerns turned more valid. Would they get through basic training, would they be homesick, when will they come home on leave, going to Korea...oh no. The boy at home was still in school and the usual school worries were with me. My friends said, "It will be fine....just give it time."

In my fifties life was a little less worrisome. They were all on their own and doing well. My worries were less. I thought to myself...all the adviceabout giving it time was working out. Oh, oh...grandchildren...I then started worrying about the grandchildren. Every thing came back  my worries about my little ones. Their parents said, "It will be all right...we'll just give it time."

Then came my early sixties and my husband was ill with cancer. I started really worrying then. How would this affect our kids. They were adults, I knew, but how would they deal with the fact that their Dad was going to die? How would we get along without him? I lay awake at night worrying about him and our children. A little worry about me crept in too. The doctor and my minister said..."Take it a day at a time...everything will work out with time."

After he died I started worrying again. I met Joe and was wanting to get married again. How would the kids react to this, would they like him, how could I move out of their family home, would they come home to see me ever again, what would people say, how would this affect their lives. Joe said to me, "Give it time...it will all work out."

Now here we are today. I have made myself sound like such a worrier. It didn't really affect my life for the worse back then. it often brought me answers to questions about problems Having an occasional sleepless night was good in a way...I tossed and turned and things stirred in my head and I found answers. Now I find that I think it is a concern for others... that is handed down from Mom to Mom. It's a Mom thing. We women are strong and often are the problem solvers in a marriage. I have learned late in life just to hand it to God and he will do my worrying.....but on this weekend of Hurricane Sandy...I find myself crawling back into that old worrying habit. I worry for my daughter, who just got to her home in Wi only to have to turn around and go back to DC,where she has a job and home. She is flying out this afternoon and will land this evening. What she will find there, is anybody's guess. Will this be the big storm that everyone is predicting...will she be OK? We talked this morning and she said, "It will be fine Mom." Now where have I heard that before?

An update...Her flight was canceled. Now I'm worried about her cat and house.


Blondie's Journal said...

I agree, women were born to worry. There are some of us that seem to lean toward the positive side of things and worry less I suppose. And the worries change from year to year as you pointed out so well, but I think all are valid. I've come to the realization that there is very little we can do about many of our worries, we just have to trust in God.

I'm hoping that your daughter stays safe in Wisconsin. That must make you a little relieved!


One Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods. said...

Balisha, once again right there with you. 2 grandchildren in N.Y.
Storm suppose to hit that area.
Son arriving soon from Thailand, Jamie is now working freelance and a grandson working internship in Washington D.C. He needs a paycheck. I want to stay independent, everyone is so busy and the list goes on and on...

Balisha said...

Hi Jane...
In the past I found that when I worried a lot the outcome was the same as it was when I didn't. It really doesn't help to worry. I think that the media is to blame for this particular worry....and I am for watching it. I guess you could say that I'm more concerned than worried.

Balisha said...

Hi Ernestine,
I thought of your family in that area too. My friend has a grand daughter in DC. I have a good friend in New England. I know of bloggers in that part of the world. Knowing that all these people are in harm's way is a big concern for all of us.We just have to have faith that it will be OK.

Roses and Lilacs said...

Women are great worriers. Men will usually tell you it doesn't do any good to worry. I think it does. I've made some good plans and come up with some good ideas during long, sleepless nights. Of course sometimes there's just no solutions to be found and what will happen will happen. In this instance, since you can't do much to help, I hope everything turns out ok.

poppilinnstudios said...

Hi Balisha,
I have always been a worrier. When I was younger and independent-I was a perfectionist and worried that I wasn't the absolute best at my jobs. Then I got married and had a family and have worried everyday about my children. I realize there's not a lot I can do to control things-but I still worry! I guess it never ends!

Babajeza said...

It's good to think about what could happen. Worst case scenario in a way. You can think of what you will do when the time has come. But I have learnt that so many things turned out to the better or not even came true. Worrying does not change a thing.

Life is about trust. Trust in yourself, in others, in God: You can do it, they can do it, He will do it in his way ain his time. Whatever "it" means. Have a nice week.